Winter 2007

Dear Henry Albert,

This is your first Winter Solstice. Hooray! (What does this mean?)

The winter solstice occurs at the instant when the Sun's position in the sky is at its greatest angular distance on the other side of the equatorial plane as the observer.

Depending on the shift of the calendar, the event of the Winter solstice occurs sometime between December 20 and 23 each year in the Northern hemisphere, and between June 20 and 23 in the Southern Hemisphere, and the winter solstice occurs during either the shortest day or the longest night of the year (not to be confused with the darkest day or nights). A more accurate usage might be the "day of the winter solstice" or the "night of/before the winter solstice".

So … What does this mean? It means that winter is starting and it is getting cold and it’s time for snow and ear muffs and mucus and soup. (More about soup later.)

(Ear muffs were invented by Murray because his ears got cold. Mucus was invented by Adams Labs. Inc. so they could sell Mucinex. Mucinex is actually Guaifenesin.)

Our ancestors, the Druids, monitored the path of the Sun at Stonehenge. Stonehenge is a fun place and the Druids were fun people. When a solstice arrived, they used to get all excited and dance around naked to celebrate. We don’t do that anymore. (Maybe.)

We also have a lot of Holidays around the start of winter. Christmas is big in America because most of the people are Christians. A lot of Jews, Hindus, Buddhists and other religious groups join in the Holiday Spirit. Even the Muslims who are not dedicated to killing all Christians, Jews, Infidels and everybody else, enjoy Christmas.

For winter it is good to play in the snow, wear ear-muffs, not have mucus, enjoy the Holidays and eat soup.

A nap is also good.