Sunday, September 30, 2007

Fasting + Yom Kippur +

Dear Henry Albert,

Fasting means not eating. Not eating means no food (unless you get intravenous feeding which is tubes dribbling stuff into your veins. Yuch!). If you get no food, you get no calories.

Food and calories build good bones, teeth, muscles and fat. FAT! If you have too many bones or teeth, it is not good. Too much fat is also not good. There are not a lot of people with too many bones or teeth. That’s good. There are a lot of people with too much fat. That is very bad. There is an epidemic of people who are too fat. (
Also cats.)
During Ramadan, Muslims are obliged to fast from sunrise to sunset. Muslims are also expected to put more effort into following the teachings of Islam as well as refraining from lying, stealing, anger, envy, greed, lust, sarcastic retorts, backbiting, and gossip. Preaching hate, killing and suicide bombings is OK.

Sawm (
Arabic: صوم) is an Arabic word for fasting regulated by Islamic jurisprudence. While fasting in the month of Ramadan is considered Fard (obligatory), ... (Some people misspell Fard and make bad jokes. Muslims find this offensive.) Sawm is one of the Five Pillars of Islam. (Not pillows!)

candy + cookies = Fat ladies .....

Overweight people: What are they? Overweight people were once fat. Fat people eat too much food and they eat foods that make you fat.

Foods to avoid: Twinkies were created in 1930. Over 500 million are consumed each year. According to Hostess (manufacturer) it takes 45 seconds to explode a Twinkie in a microwave. There are 39 ingredients in a Twinkie. Some are naturally occurring substances.
Exploding Twinkies in a microwave can be fun and is a nice family project on a rainy day.

On Yom Kippur, Jews (not all Jews) fast. They fast from sundown to after sundown the following day (24+ hours). On Yom Kippur, you are supposed to examine your behavior in the past, look for sins they may have done and contemplate being “better” and doing “good” in the future. And it’s a good way to lose some fat. Yom Kippur is known as the Day of Atonement. Jews are not allowed to eat Twinkies on Yom Kippur. Very bad!

Most religions have some sort of fasting as part of their rituals. They like fasting. Maybe that’s because a lot of them are fat. You probably noticed that some wear robes of some sort so you can’t see the blobs of fat. I don’t know any religion where they wear bikinis.


Sikhism is probably the only major organized world religion that does not promote fasting except for medical reasons. I don’t remember seeing many fat Sikhs. Maybe fasting can make you eat too much when you stop and get fat. Hmmm???
Fasting is good. Your Great-great-great Grandfather (Solomon) fasted every Monday and Thursday from sunrise until sunset. He claimed it helped him think study and have greater understanding of stuff. People sometimes get hungry when they fast. If a person is not accustomed to fasting, they get hungry and unhappy. If you fast fast, you get it over fast. If you fast slow, it takes longer.

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