Fasting + Yom Kippur +

Dear Henry Albert,

Fasting means not eating. Not eating means no food (unless you get intravenous feeding which is tubes dribbling stuff into your veins. Yuch!). If you get no food, you get no calories.

Food and calories build good bones, teeth, muscles and fat. FAT! If you have too many bones or teeth, it is not good. Too much fat is also not good. There are not a lot of people with too many bones or teeth. That’s good. There are a lot of people with too much fat. That is very bad. There is an epidemic of people who are too fat. (Also cats.)

During Ramadan, Muslims are obliged to fast from sunrise to sunset. Muslims are also expected to put more effort into following the teachings of Islam as well as refraining from lying, stealing, anger, envy, greed, lust, sarcastic retorts, backbiting, and gossip. Preaching hate, killing and suicide bombings is OK.

Sawm (Arabic: صوم) is an Arabic word for fasting regulated by Islamic jurisprudence. While fasting in the month of Ramadan is considered Fard (obligatory), ... (Some people misspell Fard and make bad jokes. Muslims find this offensive.) Sawm is one of the Five Pillars of Islam. (Not pillows!)

candy + cookies = Fat ladies .....

Overweight people: What are they? Overweight people were once fat. Fat people eat too much food and they eat foods that make you fat.

Foods to avoid: Twinkies were created in 1930. Over 500 million are consumed each year. According to Hostess (manufacturer) it takes 45 seconds to explode a Twinkie in a microwave. There are 39 ingredients in a Twinkie. Some are naturally occurring substances.

Exploding Twinkies in a microwave can be fun and is a nice family project on a rainy day.

On Yom Kippur, Jews (not all Jews) fast. They fast from sundown to after sundown the following day (24+ hours). On Yom Kippur, you are supposed to examine your behavior in the past, look for sins they may have done and contemplate being “better” and doing “good” in the future. And it’s a good way to lose some fat. Yom Kippur is known as the Day of Atonement. Jews are not allowed to eat Twinkies on Yom Kippur. Very bad!

Most religions have some sort of fasting as part of their rituals. They like fasting. Maybe that’s because a lot of them are fat. You probably noticed that some wear robes of some sort so you can’t see the blobs of fat. I don’t know any religion where they wear bikinis.

Sikhism is probably the only major organized world religion that does not promote fasting except for medical reasons. I don’t remember seeing many fat Sikhs. Maybe fasting can make you eat too much when you stop and get fat. Hmmm???

Fasting is good. Your Great-great-great Grandfather (Solomon) fasted every Monday and Thursday from sunrise until sunset. He claimed it helped him think study and have greater understanding of stuff. People sometimes get hungry when they fast. If a person is not accustomed to fasting, they get hungry and unhappy. If you fast fast, you get it over fast. If you fast slow, it takes longer.

Bluetongue disease

Dear Henry Albert,

Bluetongue disease (also called catarrhal fever) is a non-contagious, insect-borne viral disease of ruminants, mainly sheep and less frequently of cattle,[1] goats, buffalo, deer, dromedaries and antelope. There are no reports of human transmission. It is caused by the Bluetongue virus.

British veterinary officials (September 29, 2007) have confirmed a full-blown outbreak of bluetongue livestock infection. It was first detected earlier this week in a cow on a farm near Ipswich in eastern England. Since then, four additional cows have been confirmed as infected.

The virus is spread by biting insects like midges and can turn the animal's tongue blue. It strikes mostly cows and sheep, and does not affect humans.

This is very important to know. It is also important to know that anything Government or Government Officials say cannot be trusted. They tell you that Bluetongue Disease does not affect humans. Hah! Lie!

“It is better to be safe, than sorry,” sayeth the wise man.
Autumn is the end of Summer and the beginning of the runny nose, colds and all kinds of mucus producing diseases season.

You don’t need Bluetongue disease too. Watch out for the following;

Autumnal Equinox

Dear Henry Albert

The Autumnal Equinox is on September 23rd. Isn’t that exciting? Wow! Whoopee! Who cares? A lot of people don’t know what it is. And when they find out, most don’t care anyway. Other stuff is more interesting.

The Autumnal Equinox is the day that there are equal hours of day and night (12 each) all over the Earth. The Sun is directly overhead at the Tropic of Cancer at 12 noon.
The Tropic of Cancer currently lies 23° 26′ 22″ north of the Equator. If the wobbles, it will change. (More on wobbling when you are older.)

If you stand on the Tropic of Cancer at exactly 12 noon, you will not have a shadow. If you stand there before noon or after noon, you will have a shadow.
Don’t worry about it. You don’t need a shadow.

Sun dials need shadows and so do the Ancient Druids. Sun dials help us tell time. The Ancient Druids had Stonehenge to help tell the time and the seasons.

In old times, people didn’t have watches or cell phones or PDAs or radios or all kinds of gizmos that told time. People were always late or early or didn't know.

We needed a way to tell time. History shows that two pre-historic caveman tinkered and invented the hourglass and the clock. (Tinkering has nothing to do with tinkling)

Time is important. Einstein stressed the importance of time as a dimension in his Theory of Relativity. Relativity is important. You have Grandmas and Grandpas and Uncles and Aunts and Cousins and other stuff. Maybe one day you will have a cat or pet chicken.

And on Yom Kippur we don’t eat.

So .... HAPPY AUTUMNAL EQUINOX!

Also ... Our Sun is named Sol. I had an uncle named Sol. This proves Einstein was right about relativity. And also .... The Druids used to dance around naked.

Light Bulbs

Dear Henry Albert,

The light in my bathroom went kaput. I couldn’t see. It is not good if you cannot see in the bathroom. I unscrewed the old light bulb and replaced it with a new light bulb. It went unkaput and I could see again. It was good.

The old light bulb was made by Philips (Royal Philips Electronics of the Netherlands), was 75w and made in Canada. The new bulb is 75w and made in Poland by the same company.

A long time ago they had lamps, torches and other stuff.
The first light bulb was invented by Murray Light-bulb.

The first lamp was invented around 70,000 BC. A hollow rock, shell or other natural found object was filled with moss or a similar material that was soaked with animal fat and ignited. It probably smelled bad.

Wicks were later added to control the rate of burning. (Guess who invented the wick.) Around the 7th century BC, the Greeks made terra cotta lamps to replace handheld torches. The word lamp is derived from the Greek word lampas, meaning torch.

Sir Humphrey Davy of England invented the first electric carbon arc lamp in 1801. A carbon arc lamp works by hooking two carbon rods to a source of electricity. Carbon arc lamps can also be used to cook a chicken. Sir Joseph Swann of England and Thomas Edison both invented the first electric incandescent lamps around the 1870s.

The light in my bathroom from the old bulb, made in Canada and the new bulb, made in Poland is almost the same. It is hard to tell them apart. That is good. It is easy to tell the difference between Swiss cheese and American Cheese.

Animal fat lamps and whale blubber lamps can also be used for cooking chicken.
Making light bulbs in Canada and Poland is probably an example of Globalization. Ask your Daddy.

Answer: Murray Wick.

Swimming: Learning to

Dear Henry Albert,

Your Mommy and Daddy are taking you to a swim pool place. You are going to learn to swim. To swim is good. Swimming is fun; good exercise, helps you meet girls and helps you to not drown.

Who is that?

Is that a fish?

Looks like a little boy.

Can that be Henry?

Swimming can also be dangerous. You must make sure you don’t swallow water in the pool. There can be all kinds of nasty, yucky stuff in pool water. There can be germs, bugs and sometimes, nasty people pee in the pool and do even worse.

Yuch! Feh! Phooey!

Being in water a lot can be dangerous. You must also be careful you don’t get any fish diseases. Especially, Fish Eyes or Fish Brains.

Fish Eyes is when your eyes begin to look like fishes eyes. If your eyes start to look like fish eyes, it is weird and scares people.

Fish Brains is when you start to think like a fish. Also you begin to want to eat worms and flies and bugs. Also, fish are very stupid. Some people say that fish is “brain food”. If they had any brains, they wouldn’t be fish.

So … Swimming is good, or at least, OK. But … Make sure you don’t swallow the pool water or any of the stuff floating around in the pool.

Also … Regarding eating fish for “brains”: Tell your Mommy and Daddy to stick to mashed carrots or squnched green peas. P.S. The only kind of fish that I eat is pickled herring.

P.P.S Who is that?

Henry reads and plays piano.

Dear Henry Albert,

I visited you at your new apartment at the end of August at 2 Horatio Street.

I was happy to see that you can play the piano. Playing a piano is a good thing. I like Jazz and Classical and Basin Street and Dixieland and some other stuff. Schroeder played the piano. Schroeder’s friend was Snoopy.
Bugsy is your friend. Schroeder played Beethoven. Playing Beethoven may not be good. Beethoven means beet’s hooves. Cows and horses have hooves instead of feet. Beets don’t have feet or hooves. Playing Chopin is better.

I was also happy that you can read. Reading is good. You must be very careful when you read. Especially newspapers. Newspapers used to report truth. Now they sometimes report garbage and poop. Even the New York Times.
It is not good to eat newspapers. When I visited you, I fed you smushed green peas. You liked the smushed green peas. It is not good to eat the New York Times.

Maybe Beethoven doesn’t mean beet’s hooves. I’m not sure. Ask your Mommy or Daddy.

Living on the 8th floor is good. When you are older, I will tell you about water balloons.